Force Sent In To Stop Monkeys Sexually Assaulting Villagers
Agencies, BBC, Times:
A troop of vervet monkeys is giving Kenyan villagers long days and sleepless nights. The villagers estimate there are close to 300 monkeys invading the farms at dawn. They eat the village’s maize, potatoes, beans and other crops.
And because women are primarily responsible for the farms, they have borne the brunt of the problem, as they try to guard their crops. In addition to stealing their crops, the monkeys also sexually harrass and assault the women.
“The monkeys grab our breasts, and gesture at us while pointing at their private parts.”
“When we come to chase the monkeys away, we are dressed in trousers and hats, so that we look like men,” said resident Lucy Njeri.
“But the monkeys can tell the difference and they don’t run away from us and point at our breasts.”
The monkeys in the Kabete area even earned a mention in parliament last month when the local MP Paul Muite said his constituents feared the monkeys would sexually harass them.
“Can the minister deploy game rangers in Karai location in Kabete to deal with the Monkey Menace?” he asked the tourism and wildlife minister, Morris Dzoro, to laughs in the chamber.
“These creatures have clearly shown that they have no respect for women.”
Gichuki Kabukuru, a spokesman for Kenya Wildlife Service, said it was well known that monkeys and baboons have a penchant for harassing women.
All the villagers’ attempts to control the monkeys have failed - the monkeys evade traps, have lookouts to warn the others of impending attacks and snub poisoned food put out by the residents.
The town has been warned by the Kenya Wildlife Service not to harm or kill any of the monkeys, as it is a criminal offence.
Running out of options, residents are harvesting their crops early in an attempt to salvage what they can of this year’s crop.
Unfortunately, this only invites the monkeys to break into their homes and steal the harvested crops out of their granaries.
Even the formation of a “monkey squad” to keep track of the monkeys’ movements and keep them out has failed.
The area is simply too large for the few volunteers to cover, they say.
Some residents have lost hope and abandoned their homes and farms, but those who have stayed behind, like 80-year-old James Ndungu, are making a desperate plea for assistance.
“For God’s sake, the government should take pity on us and move these monkeys away because we do not want to abandon our farms,” he said.
Kenya’s Wildlife Service is sending in animal-control teams to confront the animals.
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Can’t wait until the night time comics get a hold of this.
August 26th, 2007 at 5:01 amThey better not touch one of those monkeys or peta will be on them like stink on shit.
Actually this sounds like our border with Mexico, gangs of thieves raiding our homesteads and taking what we have worked for; and we are told by the government that we are to be tolerant and if we take action against them ourselves we are the guilty ones. Pretty fucked up isn’t it?
August 26th, 2007 at 6:10 amInstead of saying “monkeys” insert “muslims”, instead of “Kenya” insert “USA”, instead of “Kenya Wildlife Service” insert “CAIR”, and everything else in the article seems to fall neatly in place.
Coincidence?
August 26th, 2007 at 7:07 amI’ve made the aforementioned switches. You be the judge, and dare to compare.
A troop of muslims is giving Kenyan villagers long days and sleepless nights. The villagers estimate there are close to 300 muslims invading the farms at dawn. They eat the village’s maize, potatoes, beans and other crops.
And because women are primarily responsible for the farms, they have borne the brunt of the problem, as they try to guard their crops. In addition to stealing their crops, the muslims also sexually harrass and assault the women.
“The muslims grab our breasts, and gesture at us while pointing at their private parts.”
“When we come to chase the muslims away, we are dressed in trousers and hats, so that we look like men,” said resident Lucy Njeri.
“But the muslims can tell the difference and they don’t run away from us and point at our breasts.”
The muslims in the Kabete area even earned a mention in parliament last month when the local MP Paul Muite said his constituents feared the muslims would sexually harass them.
“Can the minister deploy game rangers in Karai location in Kabete to deal with the Muslim Menace?” he asked the tourism and wildlife minister, Morris Dzoro, to laughs in the chamber.
“These muslims have clearly shown that they have no respect for women.”
Gichuki Kabukuru, a spokesman for CAIR, said it was well known that muslimss have a penchant for harassing women.
All the villagers’ attempts to control the muslims have failed - the muzzies evade traps, have lookouts to warn the others of impending attacks and snub poisoned food put out by the residents.
The town has been warned by the CAIR not to harm or kill any of the muslims, as it is a criminal offence.
Running out of options, residents are harvesting their crops early in an attempt to salvage what they can of this year’s crop.
Unfortunately, this only invites the muslims to break into their homes and steal the harvested crops out of their granaries.
Even the formation of a “muzzie squad” to keep track of the muslims’ movements and keep them out has failed.
The area is simply too large for the few volunteers to cover, they say.
Some residents have lost hope and abandoned their homes and farms, but those who have stayed behind, like 80-year-old James Ndungu, are making a desperate plea for assistance.
“For God’s sake, the government should take pity on us and move these muslims away because we do not want to abandon our farms,” he said.
CAIR is sending in animal-control teams to confront the muslims.
August 26th, 2007 at 7:27 amtsarbomba -
ROFLMAO
August 26th, 2007 at 7:32 amhaha tsarbomba!!
i think you’re onto something there
August 26th, 2007 at 8:07 amSounds like the bar I was at last night.
August 26th, 2007 at 8:20 amThat story is a riot.
tsarbomba: ROFLMAO
August 26th, 2007 at 8:23 amThanks for making me laugh today!
Love the story and tsarbomba’s remix.
August 26th, 2007 at 9:58 amSo that’s what Ahmadinejad is doing with those hundreds of monkeys imported into Iran. Training them to inflict even more abuse on women. So what countries is he going to export them to?
July 11th, 2008 at 3:01 pm