Bash: Why I Like Sarah Palin Pt. 1
“The Alaskan landscape is littered with the corpses of people who have crossed Sarah Palin.”
I want to know, oh Dollard Reader, what you really think of Sarah Palin.
She’s a mom, she’s smart, she’s feisty, she’s got spunk, and she’ll get in your face and kick your ass in a debate, put a bullet from her own AR-15 through your head to make her point, and then slip a copy of her lifetime NRA membership card in your cold dead hand for the mortuary guys to chuckle at.
Shoot ‘Em Up Sarah.
Pistol-Packin’ Palin.
I got a million names for this woman and they all spell Tough Conservative Right Wing God-Loving Christian Pro-Life Gun Owning Hockey Mom.
I love her.
Not for the prurient reasons I have seen some toss out in comments like “She’s hot!”
She is, but that’s like #47 on her long list of attributes.
Every time I think about McCain picking her I get that choked-up laugh in the back of my throat. I can’t fully explain it, its a feeling more than anything else.
You know the choked-up laugh…the one where you’re down by 5 in the fourth quarter at mid-field and there’s only 10 seconds left and the quarterback drops back and the linebacker swipes at his jersey, the QB stumbles, and hearts of die-hard fans everywhere stop, but your seasoned QB stays on his feet, stumbling back across the other side of the field with defenders in tow, about to pounce…
…and you see it…
…and he sees it…
…everybody sees it…
…breaking away from the cornerback at the 15 yard line and turning toward an open post is the rookie wide receiver third round draft choice who came in because the star receiver went down in the third…
…and the quarterback tosses it up and…
BOOM!
He catches the ball at the five yard line and dive’s in for the Touchdown!
That’s the choked-up laugh I’m talkin’ about.
Or if you’re an old Bay Area Raiders/Niners fan like me, it’s the same choked up laugh I had when I sat on my grandparent’s living room couch, knowing I’d be heading off to boot camp in less than 90 days and drinking brews with my Dad, my Grandpa, my cousins, and the whole family, when Joe Montana tossed “The Catch” to Dwight Clark across the back of the end zone to send the Niners, who had sucked for soooooo long (shit, we even took OJ for a season or two in the end), into the Super Bowl.
Ha! Take that Dallas. Tony Romo was literally in diapers back then.
As I sat there at my desk, somewhere around 6:30 AM PST Friday morning, listening to Campaign Carl Cameron say he had confirmation from McCain Muckety-Mucks that Alaska Governor Sarah Palin was his pick for VP, I felt that choked up laugh creep up from my belly, and a million things raced through my mind.
Not Romney? Back in the dark recesses of my un-pundit-like mind I would have sworn he was going to pick Romney to balance out the economic deficit in our camp.
Not Cantor? I was really hoping it would be Eric Cantor. Just because I like his ties.
Then the big one…
This is the biggest bitch-slap-hail-Mary-in-your-face-Barry of the Election.
Not only that, but she’ll shoot a moose and eat it, too.
I eat Moose. I love mooseburgers. My father-in-law is a big-time hunter, with a large gun collection, and he travels the world hunting big game. My father-in-law is the only person that I’ve ever seen that has more mounted animals (and I mean Deer, Elk, Moose, Cougar, Bear, Gazelle, and a hundred other critters, all of which we all ate) than Ted Nugent.
Even Ted is envious of a few of my father-in-law’s trophies (fuck you if that bugs you, we eat ‘em just like Uncle Ted).
Ted does have a giraffe, though. My father-in-law doesn’t have a giraffe. I keep telling him he needs a giraffe, and he always laughs at me and says he won’t set foot in Africa ever again, even for a giraffe. Let Ted have the giraffe.
But I imagine that’s another story.
And every year my father-in-law hunts moose up in Canada and every year we eat mooseburgers, and they are delicious!
Man, oh, man! She’s a hunter, she fishes, she’s an outdoorswoman.
I have to tell you I did six patrols in Alaska, a Coast Guard ALPAT (Alaskan Patrol) for a 378’ High Endurance Coast Guard Cutter means two months cruising waters of sometimes 34 degrees, with 50 foot waves and 90 knot winds in the Gulf of Alaska, the Bering Sea, and sometimes crossing into the Arctic Ocean, and then two months back in Hawaiian waters.
I’ve done six Alaskan patrols, bitches. I know Alaska.
I have puked into the frozen gutters of Adak, Juneau, Dutch Harbor, Kodiak, Nome, and Anchorage, hell I even went home with the bartender of the Red Dog Saloon in Juneau one wintry eve in 1983. Man, she was cute.
I can tell you that Alaska is beautiful. Even with my frozen puke on the ground.
And my pukes were from drinking…not from being a seasick green pollywog.
And there are as many beautiful women on Adak Island as there are trees.
And the wildlife…bald eagles and otters fill every port, everywhere, never seen so many.
Alaska is beautiful.
Kinda like Sarah Palin.
But I imagine, and have heard things about Sarah Palin that, like Alaska, don’t ever let the beauty fool you. Only the strong survive in Alaska. Alaska looks nice, but just try and fuck with it. Go ahead, fuck with it.
It will eat you alive.
I wouldn’t fuck with Sarah Palin, either. They didn’t call her “Sarah Barracuda” for nothing.
There’s a quote from some “journalist” somewhere, can’t remember who or where right now, sorry, it’s the quote that I remember most. It was this:
“The Alaskan landscape is littered with the corpses of people who have crossed Sarah Palin.”
Yeah! Aw hell, not just Yeah! but Fuck Yeah!
Can’t wait for a Palin/Biden debate. Truly can’t wait.
I first heard she was being considered back in May, in fact, it was the first we had ever heard of her consideration. I believe my comment was : “Not a bad idea.”
Part 2 coming soon.
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The dems are scared witless of Sarah Palan. We’ve only seen the tip of the iceberg of what they will try to attack her with in the next 61 days. But I believe that the Republicans now have a potentially winning ticket for President and Vice-President, barring something catastrophic coming out. Naturally, the dems are going to do everything they can to make that happen, by hook or by crook.
September 1st, 2008 at 10:04 pmPalin was my choice for Veep. Just didn’t believe MAC had the cajones to pick her. I believe now. She’s exactly what we all need.
September 1st, 2008 at 10:21 pmOh man Bash, there are many reasons to love Sarah Palin, but for me; regardless of her natural beauty, her feminine style, feisty demeanor, even more than she will kill and eat fuckin moose off the hoof is SHE IS MORE LIKE A MAN THAN BARACK HUSSEIN OBAMA!!!!!
She is more of a man than that pencil neck, no bowlin, finger sandwich eatin, pansy assed, prissy fuckin Barry the Wannabe Obama.
Sarah Palin!!
September 1st, 2008 at 10:35 pmShe was my pick too. I remember Bash asking the question. She was the first person to come to mind.
…it was a HUGE shocker when I found out that McCain actually picked her!
September 1st, 2008 at 10:52 pmBash,
September 1st, 2008 at 11:24 pmI know that laugh. I get that laugh to. McCain/Palin… See there it is.
Why are there so many varying statistics for Wasilla’s population? During Palin’s acceptance speech, a newscaster at Fox said there were less than 10,000. The New York Daily Mail reported 9,780. However, a British article reported 7,000, and the city’s website states there are only 6,715 people.
However, the 2004 census reported 7,738 people.
Radio talk show host Randi Rhodes tried to denigrate Wasilla as a backward town with a population of only 6,000.
September 1st, 2008 at 11:30 pmBash, Sarah was my choice as well and I know “that laugh” too. I just love it when our side takes a “first” away from the Dems. If we can get a woman elected it would give me “that laugh”!!
September 1st, 2008 at 11:55 pmI can’t wait for the remake of “basic instinct”
“Palin vs Putin”
September 2nd, 2008 at 12:36 amShe IS “the one!”
I wanted Romney named but after hearing this lady’s acceptance announcement and doing some research of her on my own, I REPEAT, she is “THE ONE!”
By that I don’t mean a spiritual blah like the Cult of Obama.
She is very rich with real life experiences and an outsider to Washington DC and corrupt politics as usual from both parties.
She relates to the American freedom lover and knows that freedom costs are high and will not yield. She knows that a strong economy and a strong military are the keys to keeping Americans free from socialism and communism.
September 2nd, 2008 at 1:11 amI do not agree with all of her views, but I do love her spirit-we need more strong and independant people around us.
September 2nd, 2008 at 2:32 amyeah bash, i had that feeling when bradshaw threw that bounce pass to franco for a td
September 2nd, 2008 at 2:34 amAll of these alleged incidents supposedly hid by Sarah Palin are no more than cheap, dirty, political, lies. The dems and BO are afraid of this woman, because she is clean, bright, arrticulate, direct , to the point,clear and can hold her own. They are afraid of the truth because the only way they can get dirt on Sarah is to make it up. They clearly want to assassinate her character before she can help John McCain steam roll into the WH. Shame on the left dems and their assassinate tactics. I’ll take Sarah any day over a lying, leftist, marxist, 1/2 muslim, cheating, coyote, racist coyote like Hussein.
Sarah is a patriot and she will represent the people, not the special interest, commie, pinko fags.
September 2nd, 2008 at 2:45 amIts time we had a real MOTHER in the Whitehouse: who fights for what is right, who has the courage to speak her mind,
who loves her children and her family, who gives true service to her constituency and not mere platitudes.
Pro Familia, Pro Deus, Pro Patria…
For Familiy, For God, For Country
Our next VP and future President….Sarah Palin…..American Woman
September 2nd, 2008 at 2:59 amIts time we had a real MOTHER in the Whitehouse: who fights for what is right, who has the courage to speak her mind,
who loves her children and her family, who gives true service to her constituency and not mere platitudes.
Pro Familia, Pro Deus, Pro Patria…
For Familiy, For God, For Country
Our next VP and future President….Sarah Palin…..American Woman
She has the pioneer spirit that made America…
It opened the Kentucky wilderness..
It populated the Great Plains….
It conquered the vastness of the American West….
It made Alaska American…..
With a baby in one arm and a musket in the other……
Like the thousands of nameless heroines who preceeded her in the Pantheon of American Women,
She isnt a celebrity she is a cause for celebration!!!!!!
As for those who think she is not ready well all I can say is she can cover my six anytime.
September 2nd, 2008 at 3:12 amIntimidates most all phony lifer politicians.
September 2nd, 2008 at 3:20 amAh yes, all those women and trees on Adak
The perfect place to inter all the flat earth tree huggin no drill punks. Makes GITMO look like a spa vacation.
She took out an incumbent republican, that is no minor feat party politics. She turned down the bridge to nowhere money. She had a hand in a Sen. Stevens leaving office.
She is a woman. While I hate choices based on race and sex there is a need to have credible candidates to help overcome such prejudices.
She represents the strongest reason I consider myself a Republican, she is an example of individual greatness. Life liberty and the pursuit of happiness is based individual freedom and is vital for American exceptionalism.
There is no doubt that her gender had a major part of in her selection, but she is so much more than just a pretty face.
September 2nd, 2008 at 3:57 amI have already talked to 6 people this weekend, 6 people that said they are changing their vote to McCain based on his decision to have Palin as his running mate.
September 2nd, 2008 at 4:17 amLeftist pukes have shown more outrage in the space of a few days at an accomplished and capable hard working mother of five than they have the last 8yrs for savage merciless terrorists who intend to destroy the entire free world.
The rabid attacks at and their spite for Sarah and her beautiful family goes way beyond cognitive dissonance, these unhinged degenerates have no shame and are soulless. They respect no one, not themselves, not others let alone their country.
If you genuinely are concerned about the future and the real challenges ahead, respect and love your country so much that you ache inside and out - McCain/Palin in Nov. The dour alternative is not even worth entertaining, not even in a heartbeat.
September 2nd, 2008 at 5:17 amI love her!! On the issues I care about; freedom, protecting this country, our troops, drilling here, does not take shit, and is as far removed from D.C. as one can be. Go McCain/Palin!!!!!
September 2nd, 2008 at 6:09 amYa, I am all over her like stink on shit. When we had that poll awhile back she was at the top of my list based on what she had done to clean up corruption and a special I saw about her husband and the Iron Horse years ago.
I have kin in Alaska, Eagle River, been there a few times and loved it. It is a lot like Maine, where I am at now just with bigger bears to hunt and less flatlanders in the summer. The guns, the family, the hunting, the fact she is a woman… I am all over it, much like Bash that shit is family tradition around here.
The outcry from the left is a good sign as well, they would not be working so hard to tear her down if they didn’t realize what a threat she was to them. The depths they will plumb to in order to try and smear her just makes them look bad thou and as they don’t have shit on her, let em have at it.
September 2nd, 2008 at 6:15 amMcCain nosedived in the polls today. Fuck.
September 2nd, 2008 at 6:28 amPolls mean shit Deathstar.
Another cool thing about Palin is that she sounds like the rest of us. Kid is knocked up, you catching heat for knocking the shit out of your abusive brother in law, you got busted for a fishing violation… Could be any one of us “Normal” Americans.
September 2nd, 2008 at 7:01 amA picture is worth a thousand words. I look at that picture and the first thing that comes to mind is intense love of family.
September 2nd, 2008 at 7:42 amHeh, or the real reason why her future son in law is marrying her daughter…
September 2nd, 2008 at 7:47 amAs VP or President, one thing is certain, when Sarah Palin gets off that plane in Bosnia, Sarah won’t be dodging sniper fire, she’ll be handling her own weapon.
September 2nd, 2008 at 8:26 amShe is like us. She could have been on liberty with Bash or fishing on the boat with her husband and look right at home doing it. She still believes in America and what we stand for. I am really looking forward to the Vice Presidential debates also. Maybe Biden will try and attack her personally, and her husband, Leonidas, will jump on the stage and beat the hell out of him. Only a wish, but that would be great.
September 2nd, 2008 at 10:07 am“And there are as many beautiful women on Adak Island as there are trees.”
Having lived in that great state of AK for 6 years, I totally understand the humor behind that statement!
Trees! on ADAK!!?
September 2nd, 2008 at 10:33 am“Radio talk show host Randi Rhodes tried to denigrate Wasilla as a backward town with a population of only 6,000.”
Billie, I don’t know about the population stats, but Wasilla is just a little ways from Anchorage and was growing great guns when I left in 1990. It’s probably gotten bigger if anything. Nice place you can see it from across the Cook Inlet, if I recall correctly. Hubby and me talked about getting small plane pilot licenses and buying a nice spread out that way, just fly into Anchorage to go to work, fly home at day’s end. Just a hop across the Inlet.
But…got transferred back to the States.
September 2nd, 2008 at 10:36 amIntimidates most all phony lifer politicians.
Ah yes, all those women and trees on Adak
The perfect place to inter all the flat earth tree huggin no drill punks. Makes GITMO look like a spa vacation.
Wow, never thought of that: Welcome to Adak Detention Center! Gitmo would indeed be paradise in comparison!
September 2nd, 2008 at 10:39 am..heh heh, yeah, that was the joke around the ship.
Adak was usually the first port we hit when heading up there from Hawaii because we’d patrol in a NW direction up the entire Hawaiian Island chain (over 300 islands, with all but 8 unihabited by humans), and then across the International Dateline (Golden Dragon time!), then turn back for the Aleutians…and the saying was always “Ah! Adak! Where they have as many beautiful women, as they do trees!”
LOL.
September 2nd, 2008 at 12:03 pmI was sitting the the SEATAC airport yesterday waiting for a flight and people started talking about Sara Palin… they are excited about her!!!
September 2nd, 2008 at 12:16 pmI was sitting the the SEATAC airport yesterday waiting for a flight and people started talking about Sara Palin… they are excited about her!!!
September 2nd, 2008 at 12:16 pm